Open Letters

Open Letters

5 Big Lessons I learned in 2017 | Life Lessons

December 31, 2017
lessons learned 2017

2017, what a ride it was! I will just go ahead and start this post otherwise I might get destructed and forget what I am trying to say here, yes, it happens! So, allow me to just pour my heart to you uninterrupted. Thank you 🙂

Guys, 2017 has been one of the most crucial years in my life, and I am not saying this diminishing the importance of the year that I was born, or when I started my first step, or when I started school or my first job, or started dating and/or becoming an adult and paying my bills, which I will tell you it is not pleasant at all.

But what I am trying to say is that 2017 has taught me a lot! It gave me some kind of direction on how I want my life to be and what I really want to do with my life. 2017 has taught me more lessons than I could ever imagine. My boyfriend and I thought we had our lessons in 2016 and we planned that 2017 could be the year that we take the 2016 lessons to action, boy, were we wrong!

Now I know what they meant when they said learning is an endless process! With all the lessons I have had in the 12 months of 2017, I will share with you 5 lessons that really shaped me into the person I am as I write this post. Here, let’s get right to it;

lessons learned 2017

 

  1. Patience

Patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to keep the good attitude while waiting. This quote sums up everything I have learnt about patience. Being patience might be pretty easy, but having a good attitude while waiting is another story. We get impatient when we are waiting for something that we are not sure when it will come. We lose the positive attitude while we wait, we worry too much and we panic a lot because deep down we don’t believe if it will come, and if it does will it be something that you want? Or you are simply waiting for another disappointment after the other.

In January or February, I was waiting for a job call after my interview and I really needed that job because you guessed it, I was jobless at that time, technically! So, the wait was really killing me, but I was lucky enough to have someone who was rooting for me and giving me hope that I will get it and everything will be ok.

So, yes I was worried, but I had hope and I had faith, I believed that things will work in my favour and they did. I got the call and got the job, I couldn’t have been happier. And that was a starting point of a new light in my life.

Bottom-line? Be patient + be hopeful + have faith + great people to support you + and give your best.

  1. It is always darkest before the dawn

Yes, it is always darkest before dawn. There was a point in my life where I had no idea how my tomorrow will be, let alone my afternoon or my night. Things just got really difficult. Talk about restructuring country’s economy after the new administration. Well, I won’t lie and say it didn’t have any impact on my life because it did, big time.

This is why I needed that job so much, because my cheese was moved and I still stuck around to see if it will come back and I came to realize it wasn’t coming back anytime soon, so it was the time to look for another place to harvest my cheese (People who have read the book “who moved my cheese” will understand this, and if you haven’t don’t worry I will post a review soon) and looking for another place for my cheese was never easy, if you asked me in January how I thought my 2017 will be I would probably tell you it will be the hardest, but I am happy to say things got better and here is where also the being patient thing comes in.

You know the funny part about all this hardship and everything, my boyfriend and I got really close and we had each other’s back and it was blessing in disguise. We still joke about it today; it was that good time for us to bond, how ironic though!

Bottom-line? No matter how hard your life gets just know that it gets better and you are almost there. Keep going, have faith and have good people to support you, you will need them.

lessons learned 2017

  1. Count your blessings and be grateful

There is always, always something to be grateful for. With all the hard times that I have been through, with all that had happened I still took heart and really counted my blessings wholeheartedly!

The fact that I was able to wake up in the morning very healthy, the fact that I had something to eat, a place to call home, people that loved me and stood for me and had my back, a healthy and loving family, a very supportive and loving boyfriend, I was the blessed person I could think of and I still think I am blessed beyond measure.

2017 taught me that things don’t go as planned quite many times and instead of complaining about it, be grateful because you have no idea what it saved you from. There are so many things that didn’t go my way and I complained so much about them. But now that I look back, I am so grateful that they didn’t happen in my way because if they did I wouldn’t probably be here telling you this story. So, bad or good I am grateful for all of it.

Bottom line: there is always something to be grateful for. Think of God, sunrise/sunset, plants, family, boy/girlfriend, wife/husband, children, your job, food, friends, and other things. Find that thing and be grateful and your heart will be happy.

  1. Pray

I am not trying to be religious or anything but prayers are so powerful in so many ways. 2017 taught me that God listens to what we have to tell him. He knows what we want but he wants us to go find him with all our hearts and tell him exactly what we want. He is a friend, he is a father, he is anything that you want him to be, he can even be your BFF, chat all day long if you want. He has all the time in the world, he invested everything, hello!

2017 have helped me to search God and really talk to him through prayers, reading the bible. I am not saying I have just turned angel all over suddenly, no, I have been the happiest through him. There is this calmness when you pray and you feel safe, and honestly, that has helped throughout 2017. There was a time when I was so broken (refer to the above points) but he held my hand and here I am still breathing and at peace as I can be and for that, I am grateful for him. Do you want to know more about how powerful prayers are? Follow this lovely lady Colle Karyn, she has helped me through it. She is a blessing.

lessons learned 2017

  1. Follow your heart and have fun

I don’t think I need to explain this but just do it. Your heart tells you to start a business and you believe that is what you truly want? Go for it! But you must be sure of what you truly want because where your heart is that’s where your treasure is. (Quoting the alchemist here, one of the best books I have read so far, have read it maybe more than I should have).

Do you want examples from me? Well, this blog here, dailylifetalk.com is me following my heart and I love every bit of it. Did I tell you I just created a YouTube channel? Again that is me following my heart and I truly am happy when I am doing either of the two. Take a leap of faith and see where it gets you.

I am taking these lessons with me in 2018 and probably I will take them all around through my lifetime. They are that important to me. However, there are a few things that I am leaving behind. I won’t explain them here because I have spoken about them so much here around the blog you can check them out.

Things I am leaving behind

  1. Comfort zone
  2. Procrastination
  3. Fear of the unknown
  4. Wasting my time
  5. Making things that don’t matter, matter.

lessons learned 2017

2018 please be the best, I am so excited. There is so much I am planning to do. And I am so ready to slay you. Do you want to know how you can make 2018 your best year? Go ahead, read this.

That’s all I have for you guys, I really hope 2017 was good to you and I believe 2018 will be even better.

Tell me, what is it that you have learnt in 2017 and what are you leaving behind? What are your big plans for 2018? Let’s continue that talk down below.

Thank you for being part of this blog in 2017 I hope we will be together in 2018 as well as we continue to live and talk about life and share daily lessons. 🙂

Happy New Year 2018 let it be the year of change.

Until 2018,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

Getting my Life Together in 2018 & Why You Should Too

December 18, 2017
reflection

Before 2018, Let’s do some reflectiion! So, just a few days until 2018 is here? Okay, my mind is still trying to accept that. I am not the only one, or am I?

Hey guys, how are you? I believe you are having a great week. I have been quite busy, but that should never be an excuse for not posting this last week!

Having said that, let’s get started. We all know that 2018 is days away. And I have mixed feelings about all this, not that I will be a year younger and that I am scared (maybe that as well, but who is counting?) 🙂 😉 it is just that I am not sure where I am at with my life. There is so much that doesn’t sit well with me, so that scares me and I hate it when I am scared.

So, my smart and clever self-had to come to play and gave me a few ideas of what I need to do to get my life together before 2018 kicks off and since I am kind and I care about you I will share them with you. And here you go:

reflection

1. Reflect

Probably this is very obvious, but hear me out. Reflecting on your life is so important and this does not have to wait until you know you have messed everything up like I have, this has to be an everyday practice. You must give a serious thought about your actions, how you react to things or people and how everything that you do reflect on the person you want to be.

I tried doing this early this year, like I would reflect on my day every night before bed. Ask myself some tough questions like what did I do better, what didn’t go so well and what can I improve. I would even reflect on how I treat people, we can’t be perfect all the time. We sometimes treat people badly, not because but because you were angry or in bad mood, still that is not an excuse to be a jerk! When you reflect on your behaviours is very easy to change them by asking questions like “how could I have handled the situation better”?

When you ask yourself that it is very easy to change that habit. Reflect on how your habits and actions influence people around you. Are you influencing them positively or negatively? If it positively then do more of those and improve a few things on that front and if it is negative then you know what to do, change that thing!

While you reflect on how you treat people, also take some time to reflect on how people treat you and what kind of influence they have in your life. People that are close to us have an impact on us in many ways and sometimes they might be holding you back because they are way too negative and they have a problem with everything that you do, my question is why the hell are you still keeping that person in your life? It is time to wave goodbye because life is too short to waste it on people who don’t have any contribution to your growth and where you are headed.

I can take days explaining why reflecting on your life is so important, but let’s save everybody’s time and simply end there. But the bottom line is: ask yourself tough questions about relationships, work, money, health, well everything about your life. Give honest answers to those questions and take actions to make sure you become the person you want to become and stick to that, at least that’s what I am going to do.

Every time you are done with reflecting, do yourself a favour and ‘declutter’! Get rid of everything that is not doing you any favour, negativity, negative people, get rid of relationships that are holding you back and charge ahead by clapping for people who are clapping for you and help you grow to become a better version of yourself.

Did I just write the whole post on one point? 🙂 Boy, I get carried away sometimes when I speak, I mean write on things that I believe in!

2. Plan, set goals and stay organized.

As I talked about this here, there is no way you can achieve anything if you have no idea what you want to achieve in the first place! So, take that notebook/diary or anything really that you can write what you want to do. In this goal list/to do list start with most important things that you must do and finish up with less important things. Be sure to start small, go step by step and you finish a task.

Planning doesn’t need to happen only when you are creating your end of the year resolution or whatever you call that. You must plan and set goals yearly, monthly, weekly, daily and hourly! Time is the most precious commodity there is in this life and we waste so much of it when we don’t know what we need to do with our lives.

As Alan Lakein put it; failing to plan is planning to fail. I totally agree with this, because if you have no idea where you want to get by the end of the day, week, month, year then you are more likely to go with any road because it doesn’t matter where you will end up! Nobody wants this life, at least not me! Plan and set S.M.A.R.T goals and be efficient and effective.

Planning, priorities and goal setting sound so easy to do but trust me none of this is as easy as they sound! You must be disciplined enough to commit yourself to doing what you say you are going to do. You must push yourself to do more and be more.

So, I will have plans and goals for every hour, day, week, month and year of my life and that will be directing my every step and along the way, I will keep repeating my first point. REFLECT and I will stop PROCRASTINATING! 

 

reflection

Because flat shoes are comfy 🙂

3. Leave my comfort zone

I wrote a whole post about this here. Comfort zones are accused to be holding us back from doing the things that we would do if we were ready to step out and experience some new challenges and see how the outside world operates.
Every success happens out of your comfort zone.

Out of your comfort zone is where every magic happens. It is only out of your comfort zone where you will have a chance to grow by taking risks and going for what you want in life. Out there is where you will be able to push yourself enough to go for what you believe you are capable of achieving.

Comfort zone is calm, beautiful and relaxing but nothing remarkable will ever happen there. Your comfort zone plays a number of tricks on you by making you believe that you are safe there and happy, but where is the fun in life if you play it safe? Take some adventure go see the world, fail along the way and learn!

If you want to read more about why it is so important to step out of your comfort zone, go and read this. Thank me later.

4. Forgive, LEARN and forget

Who here is still mad at someone for something they did wrong in 1990? If you are one of those people, please get a life because I am not sure if you have one! Getting your life together means forgetting the past, you are starting afresh. You just opened a new page, why would you want to write the same sh*t from the previous pages? It doesn’t make sense, right?

So, forgive yourself, learn from your mistakes, make a commitment that you will never do the same mistake again, forget about them, and if you want to remember them should only be for the sake of taking some lesson you might use to improve yourself. And for the people who wronged you? Forgive them, learn from how they made you feel and don’t allow them or others to make you feel that way again. You know, not forgiving them will only holding back because they still have the power over how you feel about what they did to you but once you forgive them you take the power back.

You have a choice to make here, I made mine. I will forgive, learn and forget – maybe not entirely but I will try.

Reflection

5. Stay healthy

None of the 4 mentioned points will matter if your health is poor! You must take care of yourself – your body, mind and soul! All of these three must work as a team for you to get your life together. None of it will matter if you will unhappy or sick.

Adopt some health habits if you haven’t. Make sure you eat healthily, drink enough water and exercise at least 4 times a week. I always try to stay healthy all the time even though we all know how hard it can be. I work out 3 times a week which I still think it is not enough. We all know how busy life is, but make some time to go for a walk, drink more water, drink some green tea daily and other things that you think can help you stay healthy.

Guard your heart and soul by staying positive, stress-free; read some good books, meditate/pray. I mean do anything that will help your soul to stay in peace all the time, you can’t afford it otherwise.

6. Love yourself, love others and be happy

After all, been said and done it all comes down to how you feel about yourself. Are you happy with your life? Is this how you want your life to be? If not, what can you change? Then change it. Is there something you don’t like but you can’t change it? Accept it and be content with it. Does what you do make you happy? If yes, then do more of that if not find ways to change it, improve it or accept it.

the prophet

Fall in love with yourself, love the life you are creating…enjoy every bit of it…Love the people around you…cherish your loved ones… 🙂 <3 try new things every now and then….if you are not happy with what you are doing you might as well stop doing it. Have some fun and laugh at your own mistake and grow from them. 🙂

To getting our lives together, what are you doing to make sure your life is in order when 2018 starts? Share in the comments below, let’s talk. 🙂

Happy holidays, until next time,
Jane 🙂

Open Letters

Leaving my comfort zone & Why You Should Too

December 4, 2017
comfort zone

I will go ahead and just tell you beforehand, that leaving my comfort zone is not comfortable at all! 🙁

Hey guys, how are you today? 🙂 I hope you had a good weekend and you are ready to kick the shit out of this new week! It is more like an option B if last week wasn’t good to you 🙂

It is December, Yey! Smelling a holiday and trying to beat myself up after a small reflection I had yesterday about how much/little I have accomplished so far, well, I am not proud of myself, at all. Let’s just leave it at that.

Comfort zone

Me trying to look cuter than my plants. 🙂

This small reflection I had about my progress pushed me to think about my comfort then, it is quite comfortable but it is not doing me so much good! And if you wondering what comfort zone is, here: it is a place or state in your life you feel really safe, at ease and there no much stress and we all love to live there, don’t we?

Comfort zones are accused to be holding us back from doing the things that we would do if we were ready to step out and experience some new challenges and see how the outside world operates.

So, guess who made a decision to abandon her comfort zone? Me! Me! Yes, I have decided that and I am not saying this is the first time I am making this decision, no it is not but this is the first time that I am deciding to be committed on this decision, to be disciplined and see it through and here is why:

  1. Grow my creativity

Well, this is so obvious. You cannot expect to be creative if all you do is stay in your comfort zone where you don’t have the room to try something new, see and experience something new. This blog is all about sharing day to day life lessons and I am not seeing myself sharing those lessons in my comfort zone.

I am more at ease when I am surrounded by a few people – people that I know, I get stressful in a big crowd of people so I try as much as possible to avoid these situations for the experiences of meeting new people and learning new things.

This is stopping now because it has been holding me back so much. It is not easy to admit it but once you do, you know exactly what you want to do. Take time to ask yourself what is holding you back and change I believe it is worth it because I have tried it already.

Comfort zone

This picture was taken by me at Miss Universe Tanzania. Proving that I am walking my talk.

  1. Taking risks help you to grow

Yes, taking risks help you grow. Okay, calculated and reasonable risks. And well sometimes not that calculated. Taking risks is so important for a person to grow. Risks help you do something that you know deep down that you are capable but you are simply afraid and you find it too hard to leave your comfort zone.

Taking risk might mean going for an adventure because most of the time you have no idea what will happen next but you are up for it and you are ready to ready to give your best.

I think we take risks every day anyways without even thinking about it. Try asking yourself how many decisions do you make a day and you have no idea what will come of it? So still the same thing only that this time you know that you are taking a risk and a very big one. But, great opportunities come with taking risks, so yes, yes to more risks because there is so much to learn and benefit from it.

  1. Enough with the fear of the unknown

Have you ever met a person who is so scared of trying something new? If your answer was ‘no’ just change it to ‘yes’ because you just met one, ME! 🙂 Yes, I was so scared – maybe I still am a little scared of trying something new and different, why? Because I am just scared! What am I scared of? I have no idea!

comfort zone

For example, I am so scared of escalators! Yeah, funny, I know! I would rather take the stairs than riding the escalator. The funny part is that I don’t know why I am scared of it!

I have tried a few times when I had no other choice, but I did this while holding someone’s hand. Yes, that scared! That’s just one example of the things that I am scared of with no good reason! But that is coming to an end, no more scared of the unknown!

What are you scared of?

  1. My why is way too strong

Well, when your why is too strong your comfort zone won’t be that comfortable anymore! When you know why you want to get out of your comfort zone it will be much easy for you to take some risks, go to some adventures, the fear of the unknown won’t have anything against you because your why will beat the hell out of it and you will move forward and grow as a person and achieve all that you want to achieve.

And I tell you, truly that my why is so strong that now I believe I have the will to see this decision through. That will be proved by the projects that I will be working on soon, and by soon I mean 2018, did I just say that? Yes, we are just a few weeks away until 2018. And I am so ready for it; I am ready to conquer it because my God is good. Are you ready for 2018?

Comfort zone

Also, me trying to look taller than I am.

  1. Have fun!

I know I say this so much, and I will always say it and I sometimes think I don’t say this enough!

Routines are really good, and they save so much time and they make you feel safe and organized plus everything looks perfect and we all love this. But where is the fun of life if you don’t go for some adventures and experience life on the other side of the comfort zone?

Go out there, have some adventure, take risks, fail big and succeed even bigger! There is so much fun out there, of course, you can come back to your comfort zone every once in a while and observe the view of that other side and if you enjoy it, well then do more of that!

That’s all I have for you today, step out of your comfort zone because it is holding you back. Make a decision 2018 to be the year of adventures and fun. Stay grateful and positive. Happy holidays,

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

 

Open Letters

Meet Jacqueline Alfonce Meela | A Teacher and a Model

November 14, 2017
Jackie

Hi loves 🙂 how are you today? Did you guys have a good weekend and ready to conquer the week? I am 😉 Thank you for stopping by, let’s get started with our short chat with Jackie.

So, I have met Jackie through my friend Dorcas who is a designer. I have known Dorcas since college (2010) and we have been friends ever since. She knows I admire people who are doing more with their lives and are not afraid to take risks and go for their dreams that’s why she introduced me to Jackie. Her story inspired in so many ways that’s I decided to share it with you guys. And here is our chat,

jackie

Jane: So, shall we start from the beginning?

Jackie: My name is Jacqueline Alfonce Meela (23) a teacher by profession and a model. I am an orphan since I was two years old, I was raised up by my beautiful grandmother. Beyond my teaching career, in my free time/ after school I do modeling because I am passionate about it, I also get money from it to support my living expenses and I also support my beautiful grandmother.

The feeling of being an orphan was so hectic and traumatizing but I didn’t let it consume my energy, instead, I used it as a motivation for living a dream in me. I came to realize, sometimes you need hardship and struggles to generate the meaning.

Purpose is what creates powerful stories of struggles and triumph. If you don’t have a purpose, everything seems pointless.

Despite the fact that I lost my parents at a very young age, I managed to go to school. I studied very hard to become the person I am today. I believed that, for me to accomplish anything big or small is to acknowledge that I am in control, I get to decide ‘I can do this’

The process is hard because it requires taking on responsibilities, being like “okay this is my thing now, I have to do this”.

As I mentioned, I do modeling in my free time and I officially started in 2015 and I started with Christian fashion day show, then the modeling journey continued, then I did Shammy’s dream fashion show, Tanzanite fashion show, Vaa Africa fashion show, Arusha Gem Fair.

jackie

Jane: I am so sorry about your parents.

Jackie: Thank you, Jane.

Jane: But why modeling? Why not something else?

Jackie: Everyone’s story has a beginning…every life has its meaning and potential, but sometimes it’s hard to understand our own beginnings nor realizing our true potential… There are many ways to define our fragile existence and many ways to give its meaning, but it’s our love and passion that shape its purpose and give its context.

For me, the sound of my shoes gives great joy whenever I walk on the stage presenting a variety of beautifully designed outfits as a result of the utmost creativity portrayed through clothes and this has been a response from the effort invested through watching different TV programs on fashion and modeling.

jackie

Modelling is my passion. I do it from my heart, I enjoy doing it especially when I’m on stage, and I have loved it since I was 12. Other kids used to call me Miss Tz, but I just wanted to know more about modeling and fashion. (I might be in love with people in fashion, unknowingly 🙂  😉 you will know what I mean if you read this post 🙂

Jane: Are you expecting to do anything big next year or years to come?

Jackie: I am aspiring to achieve great things through modeling and fashion. At the moment I am so determined to win the Miss Polo International 2018 in Nigeria as I am the only contestant representing my beautiful country Tanzania.

Through this contest, I cast a stone and make a call to all models, especially young women across African and the globe in general, allow your gift to shine, allow yourself to use your voice, use your talents no matter where you may have limitations. There is always an opportunity to connect and be compassionate enough to share your gifts with the world.

jackie

Well, I also plan to open an orphanage center and a school, because children without parents are mostly forgotten in my society. I became a teacher because I love children, and I will use my profession as a teacher to make a difference in their lives.

 Jane: That is really good Jackie, I wish you my best. In your opinion, what would you say is missing in the fashion industry in Tanzania?

 Jackie: What is missing in fashion or modeling industry in Tanzania is that the government is not so supportive of this industry. We are isolated, I would say…that’s why even models feel like they have to do whatever it takes to be recognized even if it means to be used sexually…

We have been witnessing every now and then the downfall of modeling agencies, they fail to see beyond ordinary…if we are to support fashion in one way or another, we must start recognizing and turning the modeling and fashion into a respectable profession.

It’s about time we stand united and call upon government and stakeholders to find a way to set things right starting with recognizing these models just like music artists or actors…they are part of art and their rights should be protected.

Fashion without models is like an ocean without fish or a tribe without customs… Why are we pretending to be proud of them when they win an international contest while we fail to heed their voice?

jackie

Jane: That is so profound Jackie, I believe your voice will be heard and acted upon. I am so grateful for taking your time to have this chat, I hope it will inspire people to go for their dreams and take risks.

Jackie: Thank you for having me, Jane and thank you for featuring me on your blog and everything that you are doing on this blog. I truly believe this will inspire even a single person out there. I just want people to remember that

Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.

Okay, that’s all I have for you today. I liked Jackie’s story and her daring nature, she just inspired me to do more with my life. Age is just a number. Let me know what you like about this chat and if you would like me to do more of these.

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

5 Ways to Manage Time | The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari

November 8, 2017
time management

How to manage your time! Not as easy as it sounds but who said it is impossible?

How are you dearies, I believe you are having a great week. Thank you for stopping by, let’s get started 🙂

So, you guys know I have been struggling with procrastination and lucky me I found ways to beat it and now I am doing pretty well. But then the struggle comes when I have to manage my time.

We all want to not only be able to do what we have to do (not procrastinate) but we have to make sure that we do everything in a reasonable amount of time, we must manage our time and stay productive.

I found ways to manage my time through the monk who sold his Ferrari, what a nice book! Remember I shared some lessons on 10 ways of radiant living. I still live by those 10 tips and I am happy to say my life is getting better and these can help you do the same.

This book is amazing, so much to learn. If you haven’t read it yet be sure to have your copy, I promise it is worth it.

Here are 5 ways I manage my time:

  1. Set priorities for each day

time management

We all know how long our to-do lists can be sometimes and you have no idea where to even start, so you are just sitting there complaining about how you have so much to do and the funny thing is that you are not doing any of things you have to do. That’s why having priorities will help you know exactly where to start and where you want to reach the end of the day. You must have a definite purpose for your day for you to stay productive. You must set goals.

Julian (in the book) says, your mind is a garden how you take care of it determines how you spend your days and planning helps your mind to know what it has to do, when and why.

Enlightened people are priority driven, let your priorities drive your day.

  1. Learn to say no and don’t let others steal your time

time management

Okay, I will be straight with you, this was really hard for me! I couldn’t say no without feeling guilty about it and if I couldn’t say no, then I will say yes and make promises I can’t keep and turn myself into a lying person, yes, that’s how hard it was for me to say a straight no! If you cannot manage to add something else to your already packed to do just simply say ‘no’. Saying no will help you do more of the things that you love to do. And you know they say if you love what you do you won’t have to work a day in your life. I totally agree with this, once you start doing what you love, your perspective of work changes entirely.

Say no to unnecessary calls and chitchats, they are stealing your time. Say no but don’t be rude about it and don’t say no to things that you must do and are your responsibilities but you are just being lazy and you force people to keep reminding you to do them, which is just not cool!

Learn to say no. Having the courage to say no to the little things in life will give you the power to say yes to the big things.

  1. Stop acting like you have 500 years to live

Do you have those weekends that you wake up and spend all the weekend in your pajamas, watching movies and when Monday comes you start asking yourself how the hell did you lose 48 hours of your life? Yeah, I have those as if I have 500 years in store for me! What a shame!

The best time to plant a tree was forty years ago. The second best time is today. Don’t waste even one minute of your day. Develop a deathbed mentality.

If you knew that today is your last day to be alive, would you still spend your time the way you do? If yes, then you have your whole life figured out and if not you need to change something in your life. Life is too short to waste it on things that won’t matter in the next 5 years from now if they don’t, then stop wasting your precious commodity – time.

time management

I had this thought of deathbed mentality a few months back, I wrote here “if I am going to die tomorrow” have a look at this and you will better understand the deathbed mentality.

  1. You must have self-discipline

Planning, priorities, goal setting and saying no sound so easy to do but trust me none of these are as easy as it sounds! You must be disciplined enough to commit yourself to doing what you say you are going to do. You must push yourself to do more and be more. Julian says time mastery lead to life mastery. Self-discipline doesn’t get strong overnight you have to put in the work, you must have willpower and promise yourself that nothing will stop you from doing what you say you will do at the time you said you will. Be creative in managing your time.

The most productive people in this world have cultivated the habit of doing the things that less productive people don’t like doing, even though they too might not like doing them.

  1. Have fun

Laughter opens your heart and soothes your soul. No one should ever take life so seriously that they forget to laugh at themselves.

Managing your time and being productive doesn’t mean you should forget to have fun along the way, if you do, well then you will be putting off living which is a bad idea. Why go to all the trouble if you can’t enjoy and be happy about your life? Have a sense of humor, it will do you good.

Do something fun, take care of yourself, I take care of plants it makes me feel happy, you should see me do that. I have fun with it and the plants do too, that is the best part of it.

time management

 

Time slips through our hands like grains of sand, never to return again. Those who use time wisely from an early age are rewarded with rich, productive and satisfying lives.

So, how do you manage your time and stay productive as much as possible? lets talk in comments below.

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

Fall in Love With Yourself and Let Happiness Find You

October 30, 2017
happiness

Fall in Love With Yourself and Let Happiness Find You.

Hey dearies, 🙂 How are you today? I hope you had a very good weekend and you are ready to rock your week because I am 🙂 Do you love yourself?

You are not the first one, I am not the first and we won’t be the last to struggle when it comes to finding happiness, trust me everybody does! I know some might not agree with me just because they are not aware of how much they struggle to find it for themselves in this life!

Some of us don’t even know what happiness is that’s why we keep on searching and the funny thing is, in every second we try to search for it, we search in all the wrong places. These places or things blind us enough to think we are happy and then in a while we find ourselves dissatisfied and then the search begins again!

happiness

Did you spot that book “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”? Yes, a review will come soon 🙂 😉

We always think we will find happiness if we have enough money to spend, if we have enough clothes in our closets or if we live in a big house! Or sometimes we think we can find happiness in our careers or other things or anything we can think of! Then the reality hit us badly and we realize those things that we thought could make us happy never did because you find yourself in square one, again, trying to figure out what could make you happy!

But the worst of all, we think we can find happiness in a ‘relationship’! Who said you will find your happiness from someone else? Why can’t we stop lying to ourselves and just accept the plain truth that no matter how much we look for happiness from things and people we will never find it?

That happiness we all look for every day, every second is in us! We are responsible for our own happiness! No matter how much we try, nobody can ever change this fact! Not even all that money you have in your bank account, not even that husband or wife you claim to love so much! That mansion you have can’t make you happy either but only one person ‘you’ that’s the person capable of making you happy!

Knowing all these should give you courage enough to believe that to be happy you have to be ready to be happy! neither of those things, that person will make you happy if you are not ready to be happy.

Let’s be honest with ourselves, if you love yourself enough to embrace who you are and be happy with whatever and whoever you are, then that is where you’ll find your happiness! Nobody knows you better than you do…your flaws, strength, and weakness! Accept yourself fully and love yourself unconditionally… Let go, stop resisting things and learn how to accept them as they come and free your soul to enjoy and explore new things, appreciate nature and be happy that you are part of it!

happiness

Only when you fall in love with yourself that’s when you will find happiness in everything that comes in your life… money, relationships, family, career or anything for that matter! You will find it everywhere because it walks with you, it is within you.

Dalai Lama once said

Human happiness and satisfaction must ultimately come from within oneself” and happiness is determined by one’s state of mind than external events.

You are fearfully wonderfully made, fall in love with yourself, embrace who you are and let happiness find you. You owe that much to yourself!

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

When They Have a Change of Heart

October 21, 2017
change of heart

Hey loves 🙂 howdy?

So, a few years back someone had a change of heart on me, well, maybe not someone maybe it was someones. And maybe I had a change of heart to some people along the way too.

We all have a change of heart sometimes, we lose friends, we lose people we thought we loved and you can be ok with all these. But it gets tricky when you are emotionally invested…it hurts so bad! 🙁

So, when that someone had a change of heart I was frustrated, I seriously was. Yes, I was emotionally invested! I turned into a crybaby. I couldn’t take it, I felt betrayed, like what are you talking about? It left me with a lot of “what the efs??” What do you mean you have lost interest??

Not like I wasn’t aware that hearts could change sometimes because I should know they do, I am an expert at changing my heart from time to time like for my shoes, flowers I liked, things I liked to do, movies I thought I liked or food I once was deeply in love with.

But you see, when someone else changes their hearts on you, it gives you some sort of rhetorical questions. The list may start from the time you open your eyes in the morning assuming you managed to get some sleep the night before (I am trying to be optimistic). Questions go like; So, I wasn’t good enough for him/her? S/he didn’t love me after all?? Was I his/her rebound?? So, all the good moments we had together meant nothing to him/her?? All the promises and plans were all lies?

These questions don’t stop; they will keep floating your mind all day long! What about the tears? Ooh, don’t let me get started with that! They will wet your eyes whenever they see you are alone (at least they respect you when other people are around, otherwise it could have been worse)!

change of heart

Trust me. Sometimes you even ask yourself “why am I crying”? You cry so much that you forget why the hell you were crying in the first place so you stop for a couple of minutes and then it hit you again “s/he had a change of heart on me” then you remember your why then the crying starts again! Yup, that bad!

But we forget one thing the heart can change sometimes, or many times, we are talking about heart here, remember?! It has no time to think, ask some tough questions… all it does is to want what it wants and it might kill you sometimes if you let it be on its own without featuring your brain into her decisions!

Just like you accept it when your heart changes throughout your life about your wants, hobbies, friends, that person you thought you loved more than anything and everything else and that’s how you should accept it when people change their hearts on you.

People may change and leave, accept the change of their hearts, embrace it. Life is still beautiful and the sky still exists, the sun still rises from East and sets West.

Everything will stay the same or better, the only difference is that they will not be there to witness the beauty of life without them in it.

It is not about you, it is about them! And maybe it is about you. But People come and go they will leave you alone whenever they decide to leave and that’s okay. You will always be on your own with your soul and your God.

life

There is someone who will come and decide they want to stay forever (I hope forever does exist, really do). They will choose to be there with you, they will choose to love you for who you are, they will be there to hold your hand and tell you it is going to be okay.

They will value and respect you enough, to be honest with you, they will choose to love you every day and they will feel lucky to have you. They will walk with you through hard times they won’t run when things get tough. After all, everything we do is a choice and love is no different!

And when that happens, be sure to be present, let go of your past, be happy, and love like you have never been hurt. Cherish that person, make new memories together and enjoy the beauty of life.

change of heart

Until then, love yourself enough to believe that you are good enough and you will always be, be happy, treat yourself well, smile and live. Find some goods in the goodbye. It might be the best thing ever happened to you!

Just remember that everybody has a somebody out there, you just have to believe!

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

How To Beat Procrastination | Confession

October 14, 2017
procrastination

If it wasn’t for procrastination I would have accomplished a lot in my life and I would probably be posting 3 days a week or every day!

I had to go right to the intro para before I decided tomorrow would be a good day to write about procrastination than today! 🙂

So, how is everyone doing? 🙂 Is October treating you right? For, me it is a two-way process. If I treat her bad then I have to expect a payback and vice versa.

I have been struggling with procrastination for a very long time! Even when I was at school, I would have an assignment due in a week but I would start working on it 2 days to deadline, not that I was too busy to do it but because I was too good at saying “Aaah, I will do this later” and you guessed it, later never comes!

And when the deadline is having me run 3 miles while I can only manage 1, I swear to myself never to do it again! I promise myself, next time I will do it right away and well, it never happens!

So, it turns to be a vicious circle! The circle that I can’t handle now that I am an adult with goals to reach and no one is here to push me to do things, no one is setting a deadline for me, no one will question me, more like, I take control of my life and adulting is no joke!

Something had to be done to make sure I rock at the adulting stuff and be the person I want to and achieve as much as I possibly can. Here are some of the things I do to stay on top of things:

  1. Call yourself out (How to be a Bawse reference) 🙂

Well, the very first thing you can do is to realize and accept the fact that you are a procrastinator and be ready to commit yourself to changing that and achieving more in life! They say the more you resist something the more you give it power. So once you look the problem in the face and admit that it is there it is the very first step to beating it!

In the process, don’t be too hard on yourself and regret all the things you couldn’t do simply because you were procrastinating, now that you know better it is never too late. Stay positive and know that you can change, I mean anybody can change if they want to.

procrastination

  1. Set goals + deadlines

There is no way you can achieve anything if you have no idea what you want to achieve in the first place! So, take that notebook/diary or anything really that you can write what you want to do. In this to goal list/to do list start with most important things that you must do and finish up with less important things. Be sure to start small, go step by step and you finish a task.

Be sure to set time in each goal, you have to state exactly how long you are planning on spending doing a task otherwise you might spend the whole day with an excuse that you are busy working on one thing, we both know you are procrastinating while trying to beat procrastination, I know this because I was that person!

This is what Harvey Mackay meant when he said a dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline.

  1. Define your working space

Our working environment has so much impact on how we feel about ourselves and how productive we can be! I have realized that when my desk is unorganized I tend to procrastinate, a lot! So, I clean up my desk to how I like it to have an empty space with a few things that I need to allow my mind to think clearly, play some music and this has helped me a lot to stop procrastination.

Find out what works for you and do that!

procrastination

  1. Start even when you are not ready (Take action)

Okay, procrastinator to procrastinator, we both know how good we are at finding reasons not to do something! Sometime back before I decided to change, I would seat down ready to work but then I will remember about that apple I have in my fridge will go take it get back on my chair saying “let’s do this”!

But then before I even start I remember about that message I didn’t reply from two days ago and then I will go on Instagram and you know what happens there when you start scrolling, 5 hours later I haven’t done anything! And you know what comes next? I hate myself for being lazy and swear it won’t happen again and yet, somehow it happens all the time!

To put an end to this, I started to jump right into doing something even when I am not ready! Without giving myself a chance to over think and find ways to procrastinate. The funny thing is that 15 minutes later I am like, ‘ooh, this was easy than I thought’ and in the process, I fall in love with a task, feel good about myself and then I made it a habit since then! We procrastinate sometimes not because we are lazy but because we are scared of starting a task, back in our mind we think we might fail. So, just do it!

procrastination

  1. Celebrate every small victory

As I mentioned here that adding something you enjoy into the very end of your to-do list helps you focus on finishing up your tasks so you can enjoy that one episode of the good place or that movie you have been eying on.

When you this you are somehow forcing your mind not to procrastinate because at the end of it there is something good to enjoy.

You know it feels good when you have a tick on each task, your mind feels much better, you don’t have anything to feel bad about and the funny thing about our mind is that when it associates itself with some pleasure it tends to be more productive on anything that feels like “pleasure”!  So, trick your mind into loving what you do and you will always be productive!

  1. Publicize your goals

Not like publically announce your goals, no, I mean, for me I choose someone to tell about my goals and when exactly I want to achieve them. This helps because I like winning, I really do! So, when I tell you I am going to do this and that I am committing myself to that, because, yes, who likes to be perceived as a failure? No one!

So, choose a person that will help you to be accountable for your action, trust me your mind will scare away from procrastinating and it will help you achieve your goals.

life

  1. Reflect

Reflect on yourself. Ask some tough questions like are you doing as good as you want to? Is there anything you can do better? is there anything you want to change? Is there anything you want to do differently?

There is always a room for improvement and reflecting on yourself helps you do exactly that. But don’t be hard on yourself in the process. Applause yourself if there is something that you gave your best.

Just do it even when you are not ready! You got this.

Don’t wait; the time will never be just right. Napoleon Hill.

How do you beat procrastination? Let’s talk in the comment section below.

Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

Moving Past Tough Seasons of Life | Pushing Forward

October 1, 2017
life

It is October everyone, Yey! 🙂 Happy new Month, good people. Time flies, 3 months to 2018. Khaaa! How the hell did we get here? I hope I am not the only one asking this? 🙂 For my sake, I hope not 😉

In 1997, I was between ages 5-10. It was at this age that I could really understand things (ok, not clearly, but I did!) I just started standard one then and well you know how it feels when you start school, you feel like you are growing up because you wake up in the morning and look forward to something exciting!

I could brag about it not so much though; my mom was a teacher at my school (still is and I am proud of her) I had to keep it cool! 🙂 You know, high grades…excellent manners… 😉

I started standard one in 1997, then in 2003 I was in standard seven…well then I figured that we start at some point and end at the other and then start again somewhere.

life

When a day starts it is obvious it will end and then a new day comes, then a new week starts and then it ends and then a new one is here…and then a new year begins and then it ends after 12 months! So everything begins and ends…and that’s how it is and that’s how it will always be!

In life, we go through different situations… as we live on we start some new friendships, we get an exciting new job…and they pay you handsomely and life is good! You build some new business, relationships and everything is just perfect and all is well!

But then, there is a season for everything in this life! Season of happiness, a season of sorrow, sadness, anger, laughter and season for everything!

And when the seasons of sadness and sorrow come to our life all over suddenly everything is turned upside down and nothing seems to be alright! The friendships and relationships that were so exciting at the beginning they now bring tears…they bring sorrow and sadness to us because the season is over!

That job you loved so much is over and you have nothing to look forward to when you go to bed at night because the new season has begun!

When all this begins, when the new season begins (the season that does not favor us) we lose hope! We tell ourselves how bad this is and how you don’t know how all this happened because it was all fine just yesterday!

life

 

Everything that you believed in, everything that you loved about your life disappeared and you just don’t know what to do!

You ask yourself a thousand questions of why did happen to you, why did it happen now and you ask yourself where you did go wrong and what did you do wrong and you have no answer to even a single question from all of this!

You try to figure out your options; like what should you do? Where you should start and who you should talk to about all this and to your surprise, you can’t find anyone and you think your only option is to give up!

You choose to give up on building new relationships, new friendships! You give up on finding a new job, you forget all the potentials, skills and experiences that you have on getting any new job of your professional if you really tried to look for one! You don’t want to start a new business because you are scared it is going to fail, again!

The change of season kicks you hard in the stomach; you even give up on yourself! You forget how good you are!

When this happens, I lose my cool. I cry myself to sleep every night. I Curse on everything until things get better! Until I get a hold of myself and start over again.

When you remember that your thoughts and actions determine your life, you get up and push forward even harder.

All of these are just seasons! Good or bad, summer or winter, it won’t last forever! If your life turned upside down and you don’t know what to do then tell yourself that the seasons changed a bit but soon enough your favorite season will come and all will be good!

 

life

If 2017 wasn’t your year if you didn’t achieve what you planned to then don’t give up on yourself and what you want…The three remaining months might make a difference if you try harder but if it doesn’t then 2018 is coming and if you keep your faith, efforts and focus then you will achieve even more!

1997 didn’t last that long…2017 is ending, it might not have been as good as we all wanted it to be but we had it and the most important thing is that we had our lessons and we should be grateful and learn from it so that 2018 will be as incredible as we hope it to be! (Tuning to a new day has come by Celine Dion)

Just remember, if it starts somewhere then it must end somewhere! Stay positive, go for what you want, work hard, stay humble and be grateful always.

life

It gets better, keep pushing forward.

 Until next time,

Jane 🙂

Open Letters

#WCW Meet Flaviana Matata | Dreamers & Doers

September 27, 2017
Flaviana Matata

So, if you haven’t noticed by now I am a kind of person who feels happy when other people are succeeding and achieving their goals.

You see, I get really inspired and motivated by them; they help me to believe that anybody has a chance to achieve their goals and they give me a new perspective to life every single day.

As a way of celebrating their achievements and spreading the positive vibes here, I am starting a series called “Dreamers & Doers” to recognize their achievements. Who knows, they might motivate you to do more.

So, gals & boys, 😉 meet Flaviana Matata. I am not ashamed to say I stalk her on her Instagram page. I don’t stalk her to get some gossip, if you know her then you know that there is no gossip you will find on her page and yes I am so picky on who I follow on Instagram because I love feeding my mind with the best food and she provides that.

 

Flaviana Matata

Flaviana seems to be a down to earth person, simple, courageous and yes very beautiful. She might be the Tanzania sweetheart. I haven’t had a chance to meet her yet, but I still believe she is what I define her to be (not that I have the right to do that) I am a good judge of character.

Flaviana is an International model, a philanthropist, and a businesswoman. She started her career in 2007 when she won Miss Universe Pageant in Tanzania and later she was the first person to represent Tanzania in the Miss Universe competition where she landed on number 6 after the semifinals.

Modeling career + how it all started

flaviana matata

 

Flaviana’s career started when she was discovered by Russell Simmons who paved her way to landing interviews with different modeling agencies in the US. Thanks to those interviews she signed her first contract with NEXT – New York, London, and Paris.

She has worked with a number of big names in the fashion industry like Jason Wu, Charlotte Ronson, Rachel Roy, Tommy Hilfiger, Tony Burch and Vivienne Westwood. This Tanzanian supermodel is the only African model to be a part of the Diesel + EDUN campaign for Africa – an initiative by the two brands to benefit African cotton farmers.

Now this superwoman is working with Wilhelmina Models US and Boss Models South Africa and according to Forbes, she was one of the top seven models with the highest income in Africa 2013.

Philanthropy

flaviana matata

“Imagine a place where equality really does exist. Imagine a place where girls can excel in education and be valued members of society. Imagine a place where women can apply their knowledge and skills to stop the cycle of poverty from continuing”. Flaviana Matata Foundation.

This kind of vision gives you a picture of what kind of a person Flaviana is! The Flaviana Matata Foundation (Check her website here.) aims at making sure that underprivileged girls have equal chance to get education.

Projects under the Flaviana Matata Foundation include:

  • Education Sponsorship for Young Girls
  • Stationery Back To School Project 2017
  • New Classroom Project in partnership with Franco Tramontano
  • Teachers Latrines Project
  • Students Latrines Project in partnership with Mo Dewji Foundation

There is something inspiring when you achieve your goals and you still take time to make sure your community is well taken care of. No one has ever become poor from giving.

Business

 

Flaviana Matata

As I mentioned Flaviana is a successful businesswoman. She is the founder and owner of Lavy Products (nail polish) with its presence in Tanzania, Uganda, Kenya, USA, SA, and Rwanda. The first shipment sold out in two weeks, this proves how good the product is.

According to how we made is in Africa, Flaviana wants to expand her company’s portfolio beyond just nail polish, becoming a one-stop shop for nail-care products, with items such as nail files, cuticle oils, lotions and nail-polish removers.

Love + Relationship

flaviana Matata

Flaviana is a happily married woman. She tied the knot with Deo Massawe in 2015.

According to Defining Dar, Flaviana believes that marriage brings in commitment, that none other relationship has. Two people can live together while not being married, but a marriage brings in God’s blessings and that is what I believe makes it so special.

More reads:

The go-giver | Book Review

The prophet | Book Review

How I find my reading time.

Women supporting women 

Having following Flaviana’s journey and achievements I have come to realize that everything is possible and hard work pays regardless of what people say. Go for what you want, work hard for it, be nice to people and give back.

I know there is a lot going on at the moment, according to her Instagram page, she is now working with which says she very excited about it and still humble as always.

flaviana matata

I am hoping to have a talk with her before the end of this year, which will be a dream come true for me! 🙂 I love her and how courageous she is. Featuring her here in this space will be a step forward for me and it will motivate many of young women in my country and elsewhere. Fingers crossed guys. 🙂

Be sure to check out her Instagram page here. And you can check my Instagram here 😉 🙂

Work for what you want and be persistent. Flaviana Matata

Photos: Her Instagram page

So, who inspires you?

Until next time guys,

Jane